Wynonna's Rat Smoothie Cocktail Recipe
- Wandering Ewe
- Oct 28, 2017
- 7 min read
It’s Halloween, I’m a no chill Earper and I’m trying my hand at doing a blog. So what better way to celebrate all three than with a recipe for Wynonna’s (or rather Goononna’s) rat smoothie cocktail. This is also the first of a new theme I’m doing called #EarperEdibles, which will feature recipes and behind the scenes larger bakes adapted to all things Wynonna Earp. I’m sure there will be some disastrous failures as well as successes with these adapted recipes, but we’ll give it a go and review the outcome. I’ll be running this here on the blog as well as on twitter (@OutTheFlockBlog).
This recipe is one I have adapted and ‘Earped’ from one provided by a local supermarket. The full ‘Earped’ recipe can been found at the bottom of this post. Right let’s get into it…
Wait…you’re not vegan are you? Well it’s ok if you are because this rat smoothie is veggie and vegan friendly too.
First of all get all of your ingredients out and ready. I find it handier than trying to rummage through a cupboard for a long lost packet whilst your hands are covered in something or other.
I destalked roughly 200g of strawberries. You can use fresh or frozen ones as they will be blended anyway. I opted for fresh ones just because they were on offer at my local store and because I wanted to eat the leftovers. These were put in a blender with approximately 200g mixed fruit. For this one I used a frozen mix to give a good range of fruits and colours. The original recipe said to use raspberries, which still works well and tastes just as good. Although when replicating a blended rat you want those little black flecks you can only get from blackberries and blackcurrants, for that authentic blended innards touch.
Add two handfuls of ice to the strawberries and mixed fruit in the blender. If you’ve got a blender like mine, where you’re not fully convinced it will survive crushing ice cubes and sounds like you’re chopping gravel, give them a bit of a bash to make them smaller before they go in the blender. The best way is to use a rolling pin or similar and go all Wynonna on it. Make sure the ice cubes are in a bag though before you begin whacking, you don’t want to be chasing them round the kitchen. Once the ice cubes are in the blender add in the juice of 2 limes too. Or use 2-3 tablespoons of lime juice from concentrate. The more tablespoons you add the sharper it will be. Something I found out very quickly after adding 4 tablespoons, taking one sip and my face turning inside out from the sharpness. If you like that kind of sharp kick to a drink then by all means go all in and add 4 tablespoons. If you’ve done it by accident or are regretting your overzealous lime juice adding like I did, you can help to counteract it with a few teaspoons of sugar at the end.
So the strawberries, mixed fruits, ice cubes and lime juice are in the blender. Give it a good blitz together until it’s a smoothie slush-like mixture. Now act like Lou Bega and get your Mambo No.5 on because if it looks like this then you’re doing it right…
If you want to cock up this mocktail it’s alcohol adding time. The original recipe said to add white rum, but for various reasons and from various experiences that I will not go into here, rum is not my friend! I’m more of a vodka kinda gal. So in to the blender goes 100ml of vodka. Smirnoff Nordic Berry vodka in this instance. I’m intrigued to know what it’s like with other flavours of vodka so if anyone gives it a try let me know how it turns out.
Time to add some satisfyingly gross chunkiness for added effect and ‘ploppage’ whilst pouring. I destalked some more strawberries and roughly chopped them into slices and then chunks. Any size of chunk is fine as long as they’re not tiny. It works best if they are more irregular and a mix of sizes. I added these to the blended mixture and gave it a stir. Be careful to keep your spoon or spatula away from the blender blades. Yes we want it chunky, but we don’t want bits of wood or plastic in there.
If you want to sugar the rim of the glasses, because you’re not a heathen. Or because you’re more organised than I was and you don’t forget when you make this. Sprinkle some sugar onto a plate, dip the glass rim in some lime juice and then into the sugar.
Next comes the fun and potentially messy part. Carefully (and I mean carefully!) pouring the mixture into the glasses. Those chunky bits can create some impressively large splashes. Splashes that go everywhere and leave a berry stain on your mums new dishcloth that she still doesn’t know about because you’ve skilfully folded it, hiding it from view and slowly walked away pretending it didn’t happen! So yes, slowly and carefully pour it into glasses. I opted for a big ol’ glass to make it look more like Wynonna’s. (Side note: you can pour it through a sieve to remove the tiny berry seeds, but you’ll have to pick out the strawberry chunks to add them back in the drink).
For the final flourish, the rats tail itself. I used some Haribo Balla Stix (no I didn’t know they were called that either!) mainly because they looked the right kind of colour for a rats tail and I like them, so bonus. You could also use gummy worms or gummy snakes. Anything that’s long and thin and not too solid, you want some droopage (no, not in that way. I know what you were thinking!!). If you’re making the vegan version of this recipe don’t forget to get vegan friendly sweets instead for this part. I cut one of the stix in half first and then cut it to a point at one end. This makes it look more tapered and rat like. Dip the non-tapered end into the mixture and bend it over the rim of the glass and hey presto you’ve got a rats tail garnish. If you’ve used whole limes you can also add some zest as a garnish too if you’re feeling really fancy.
So there you have it. One rat smoothie cocktail fit for any Earper this Halloween. Anything you don’t drink can be put in a sterilised bottle and kept chilled for future use. A word of warning, if you’ve added alcohol, it can be quite strong so I wouldn’t recommend drinking the whole glassful I’ve shown in the pictures. Maybe pour out less per glass or use smaller glasses.
Overall this was quite easy to make and it tasted good too. Next time I’d add in less lime juice, but that’s just my personal taste, which is more sweet than sour. Plus it has a lot of fruit in so it’s got to count towards one of your five a day right? Let’s go with yes for now.
Let me know if you give this a try, if you used different alcohol and show me your rat smoothie cocktail pics, I’d love to see them (Twitter: @OutTheFlock). Until next time and with more #EarperEdibles on the way, catch you on the flippity flop. (Recipe below)
Ingredients (serves 8 people. Prep time 10 mins):
200g Strawberries – fresh or frozen, for blending
A handful of extra strawberries to be chopped and kept chunky
200g Mixed fruit – I used a frozen mix
2 big handfuls of ice cubes
2 limes or 2-3 tablespoons of lime juice from concentrate. 4 tablespoons if you like it sharp!
100ml alcohol of your choice (optional) – I used Smirnoff Nordic Berry Vodka but you can use anything you like e.g. White Rum. Or leave it out entirely if you want a non-alcoholic version.
A packet of long thin sweets – I used some red Haribo Balla Stix. You could also use gummy worms, as long as it resembles a rat tail it’s good to go. (Make sure to choose your fav vegan sweet for this part if wanting the vegan version of this recipe).
A few spoons of sugar if you want to sugar the rim of the glass.
Method:
If you want to give your rat smoothie cocktail a fancy touch and you’re using lime fruits, zest the limes and keep them to one side for sprinkling on later.
Put the 200g of strawberries (remembering to keep the extra handful of strawberries separate and to the side) and the 200g of mixed fruit in a blender and add the ice and the juice of the limes.
Blend until a smooth slushy-like consistency.
Add the 100ml of alcohol if desired.
Remove the stalks and chop the handful of extra strawberries. Make sure not to chop them too small and there’s no need to be precise, you want them chunky and irregular.
Add the chopped strawberries to the slushy-like mixture, lightly stir but DO NOT BLEND.
If sugaring the rim of the glass sprinkle a few spoonful’s of sugar onto a plate or saucer. Lightly dip the glass rims in some lime juice and then in the sugar.
Carefully pour the blended mixture into the glasses, don’t forget it’s chunky!
Add the lime zest curls on top as a garnish if choosing to use them.
For the rat tail; take one of your chosen long thin sweets and place on a chopping board. Using a knife cut one end of the sweet into a point to give it a tapered look. Then drape the sweet over the rim of the glass, with one end dipping into the smoothie mixture and making sure the tapered end is hanging on the outside of the glass.
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